New Year Reflections

Writing more, writing better, writing more consistently. Writing always makes an appearance on my goals/resolutions for the year ahead. As I get older list list essentially stays the same from year to year. Each new year simply gives me the chance to revisit and remind myself of how helpful these daily habits can be in living life in a way with more ease.

My word for 2020 is soften.

I’m on sabbatical this semester (my blessings are truly great…), and while I’m so thrilled and excited, I also find it daunting, and so writing will be an even greater focus in the year ahead. As such, I hope to continue writing here in this blog. While the blog has become a kind of catch all for my random thoughts about any and everything (as opposed to the focus on motherhood and domestic life with which it began), I’m not going to let myself worry too much about the what the blog is or should be. The important thing is that words appear here.

Levi just had his sixth birthday this week. Which means that in April I will have had this blog for six years. It seems impossible. I love having this written record of tidbits from the past six years of my life as a mom–something I never imagined I’d be.

Since around this time each year I return to this blog with the same basic life goals, I figure I wouldn’t spend the time here now rehashing them for 2021. Instead, I’ll offer a round-up of previous new year reflections and Levi birthday posts.

2020: Word was savor. Much like this year, last year was dedicated to continuing many of the same goals and habits that I had already established in my life but simply wanted to do more and better (tomorrow’s post–a review of how I did).

2019: Word was balance. Theme was “no time like the present.” With this them I wanted to focus on both being/staying present and also getting things done in the moment rather than putting them off. I tried to follow a two-minute rule–if something takes two minutes or less, do it immediately. I think I’m most improved in this area when it comes to adding items to my grocery list.

2018: Doesn’t appear to have a word. Resolutions/goals are familiar: five hours of writing per week; self-help/better person; meditation + movement; better with $$/savings.

2017: Word was enough. Began the year without a plan (gasp!) or specific resolutions in place! But I wanted to turn around my attitude of feeling like each day was “never enough,” which had become a kind evening mantra for me ever since Levi was born.

I will tell myself, “enough is enough” in a kind way — as in, yes, you’ve done enough.  It’s time to hang your hat on this day.  It’s time to stop (become a “human being, not a human doing, as my former massage therapist used to always say to me).  It’s time to celebrate all that you’ve accomplished today.

2016: Didn’t have a word or even a specific post, but in general my writing addressed the slowly dawning realization that perfection is an impossibility and trying for it was exhausting me and not good for my mental health (duh…).

I am also going to forgo wishes for a better year ahead. While I’m not devoid of hope (there is much to be hopeful for/about–a new administration in less than two weeks, Covid-19 vaccines emerging), at this point 2020 seems to have simply bled into 2021 without break or distinction. Nothing feels clean about this slate to me right now. So instead of imagining a year ahead that is better than the past year, I am simply taking it one day at time. I pretty much have my head down as I tip-toe slowly and cautiously into this new year.

I will, however, take all that I’ve learned over the past few years and continue to apply it to the life I live now. I will take all of these words–savor, balance, enough, soften–and use them as daily mantras and intentions for the uncertain days ahead.